Things I've learned this year

As I close the book on 35, I realized that this year has been pivotal ~ I’ve learned more, grown more, put myself out there more and allowed myself to experience more things I would have never imagined.

My top ten list of things I learned while being 35

10.  I will NEVER master the art of bread-machine baking, so I will stick to tried and true loaf pans and kneading. (Seriously. It should be so easy. How can I NOT do this?!?)

9.     I now am closer to 40 than I am to 30. (Hmmm … No explanation necessary.)

8.     I don’t like change, but I do embrace new opportunities. (I don’t like my dentist retiring, my in-laws leaving for the winter or having my schedule interrupted, but I love taking more photos, writing about amazing people and growing my circle of friends!)

7.     Homeschooling is about making school work at home for your family. (We bravely stepped outside some of the box this year.)

6.     I fiercely miss creative writing, but I absolutely love non-fiction writing! (I now have written for a newspaper longer than I had been a teacher; this year I was able to write a research-based article for a magazine and I was surprised by how much I enjoyed it!)

5.     Starting a blog is scary. (I am expanding my photography business – follow me here – and writing more, so this gives me an opportunity forces me to do both.)

4.     I can pet a horse and feed a dog. (I’ve met some really amazing people this year – one talented woman left me alone in an arena with a horse that was not on a lead rope *gasp, panic, or whatever emotive language you need to insert here* and another gentleman forced wedged cheese in my hand during a presentation I was watching while sitting next to him and his service dog.)

3.     Some of the sweetest people often face the most difficult of challenges, but face them with grace and dignity. (Countless people have walked into and out of my life this year who have taught me to be thankful each and every day.)

2.     Every time you say, “yes” to one thing, you are, in effect, saying, “no” to something else. (It has been hard, but we are choosing to say “yes” to more family dinners, “yes” to more time with friends and “yes” to less stressful days while saying “no” to overscheduled evenings and also saying “no” to some things we’ve “always done” just because we’ve always done them.)

1.     One moment - one experience - can change your life forever. (There have been a lot of moments this year, but one in particular has altered my life forever and I will always be indebted to those who made that happen.)

So, as I open the chapter of year 36, I look forward to all I have yet to learn and experience.

Thanks for tagging along on this journey while I am Just Writing Through!

For pictures, here is a sprinkling of my day ~ schoolwork, playtime, reading and making Belgium waffles! And, my girls gave me a gift card from my favorite bookstore Read Between the Lynes:)

Daddy's birthday bake-a-thon!

It would be safe to say that yesterday was an 18-hour bake-a-thon. My dear husband is celebrating his birthday today, so yesterday (with Daddy gone for fifteen hours), the girls and I made four loaves of bread (two wheat and two cinnamon raisin), one chocolate truffle Bundt cake, a lot of mini meatloaves and some very special birthday cards for Daddy.

My oven was on ALL day!

Our house smelled delicious!

And, we got all our schoolwork done.

I enjoy being home in the winter; so don’t mind spending the entire day inside. I love that my littles enjoy snuggling, reading books and baking with me. A whole day to ourselves is a luxury! Though I wish my husband were home, I still relish the opportunity to share these days with my girls. I know it will not always be this way …

But today is my sweet husband’s birthday, so, I leave you with some pictures of our yesterday. I am so blessed to have this hardworking man in my life – a man who loves me unconditionally, is the perfect father to our daughters and makes this life of ours not perfect, but perfect for us. Happy birthday, to the love of my life!

One moment

I am a wife, stay-at-home mom, homeschooler, photographer and writer. I know. It is crazy to me, too.

My husband had planned to give me an afternoon to work on an article I am pitching to a magazine and I ducked into my local Starbuck for some much-needed quiet research time.

I felt quite lucky to find a table at which to sit, and I pulled out my computer and some notes. I settled in with my trenta black iced tea (yep, I love my iced tea THAT much!)  and a small box of crackers, cheese and fruit.

Not more than five minutes into my work I noticed a man - with whom I've spoken before - walk in. I am ashamed to say that I focused with a laser-stare at my computer and prayed that this gentleman wouldn't see me.

Alas, I felt the tapping at my shoulder.

"Ma'am, I'm sorry, but I've fallen on hard times and I'm trying to catch the train," he began.

"Hi, M____. Yes. I know. We've spoken before," I said - hiding my frustration.

"Do you have some money? I have a daughter and I haven't seen her in three years," he said.

"I know, I know," I said. That was the moment. The connection had begun.

With vivid detail, I remembered him previously having talked about his daughter, her age and her birthday. I knew his previous profession. I recalled his downward spiral. I am not great in math or with numbers, but I can pull random facts about strangers and family alike out of my head without hesitation.

Tears flowed onto weathered cheeks. Hands boasting a rougher life than most cradled his head. A broken voice tried to share words, but none came.

What do you do in that moment?

I sat there, arm around his shoulder, and waited. After he composed himself, he said he couldn't believe I remembered about his little girl. While I apologized for not having anything but a few dollars, he said not even his friends at the shelter remember his daughter.

I passed over my protein box and we spent the afternoon talking about his regrets, how he was trying to change his future and how much his girl needed him.

A lot of time passed.

I didn't get more than a few words written that afternoon.

My head wanted to do something, but God had other plans. Had I not listened to my heart, I would have said, "no," to the initial question and kept my hat on. But, my soul was stirred and God's plan for me that day was not to write, but rather to listen to and treat a man without a home as a human being - as a friend.

I'll be blunt. I don't always listen when God speaks to me. Probably more times than not,  I've turned from the whisper. That afternoon, I heard it - and I followed the call.

In a moment, the entire course of my day changed. I didn't have much to offer this man, but what little I did - time and conversation - I offered without limitations. And he, again having little, offered me conversation and trusted me enough to share his failures and his desires and his dreams.

Two lives. Three hours. One moment.

Live the moment.

Auld lang syne

I know, no one knows what that even means, but we hear it every New Year's Eve. It means "times long past" - or cherished memories.

I must admit, I am not a big New Year's kind of girl. I usually stay in - even before we had kids. We watch the celebrations on television. We spend time with each other. My parents usually come over and ring in the new year with us.

We've hosted some special people over the last three days - new friends, old friends and family friends.

Inviting people to our home and cooking for them is something I've always enjoyed. I'd rather cook for someone than buy a gift. Cooking for others is something that makes my heart happy - it fills a need. Food fills an empty stomach and conversation fills an empty heart - and, sometimes, it is in the company of others that we truly find ourselves.

When I want to cherish times long past, I want to remember the people who have walked through my doors. I want to keep our conversations in my heart. I want to know that, at the very least, I'd fed a very real need if I did nothing else.

I may not be able bestow lavish gifts upon my guests, but what I can give is the gift of time, nourishment and a listening ear. There are conversations at coffee houses, homes and on busy streets that will live a lifetime in my heart - because they have so profoundly affected me. I am forever grateful for those moments when strangers lend a willing ear. I have small(ish) children, so I know it isn't always as quiet as other places, but it is my hope that eating at my home leaves my guests with a feeling of being welcomed, wanted and cherished.

Last night, I thought about my many cherished memories of 2014. As I look forward to New Year's Eve 2015, I am thinking about what my "auld lang syne" will be this year - and I am planning today!

Peace and joy to you this New Year's Day!

Hope

Every Christmas Eve, my husband and I stay up too late.

We go to Mass on Christmas Eve with my parents.

We go to their home for Christmas dinner.

We sing, "Happy Birthday, Jesus."

My dad dresses up like Santa Claus and my mother dresses as Mrs. Claus.

The kids know. But, they play along.

We do Santa at our house. Some don't. But the joy of Christmas is that Santa fosters a belief in things that cannot be seen. Life today requires that. Too often, the tangible is put above hope. Santa is never seen, yet we believe that the next morning there will be gifts under the tree because, in the tradition of Saint Nicholas, Santa embodies goodness and generosity.

Beautiful, perfect baby Jesus - pure and innocent - came to earth, born of the Blessed Virgin Mary. He served others with gentleness and offers eternal salvation. Don't get me wrong, I am not comparing Santa (or even the extraordinary generosity of Saint Nicholas) to Jesus. They both, however, are kind and generous and willing to overlook imperfections - even if we see ourselves as unworthy. As adults we approach Jesus with the same childlike wonder as we did with wrapped gifts under the tree on Christmas morning. Children often can't fully grasp the gift of salvation, but they can believe in and model the act of selfless giving.

It is easy to hope when we are children - everything is seen with wonder and awe. As adults, hope becomes more difficult. But, faith - well-developed and often practiced - keeps hope alive, even when hope seems lost.

This Christmas morning, with awe and reverence, we open a gift of His love and His saving grace. Hope.

One of my kids' favorite things is to see baby Jesus "appear" in the manger. He comes, wrapped in swaddling clothes, on Christmas Eve after Mass.

As we celebrate Jesus' birth and all of the joy that comes with our Savior, we remember that He is ALWAYS present - that this little baby, hardly the vision of a king, humbled himself to be born in a stable. Jesus was a child. And, he had the same childlike wonder we see in our own children. I can't imagine the joy that wonder put on Mary's face.

Peace and joy to you this Christmas Day!

A peek into my office, some exciting news and a discourse on the value of books

This is what my desk corner looks like.

I started my adult life as an English/journalism teacher. That career has since morphed into a new one: photographer and writer.

Those who know me well – specifically my best friend from college – know that throughout my college years (and some time beyond that), I carried a pocket-sized dictionary, thesaurus and stylebook in my purse.

They were lifelines for me. At any time, I could find the meaning of a word, locate an adjective that wasn’t overused and make sure I chose the correct preposition, adverb or punctuation mark.

A couple of years ago, my friend was back in town and we were out having coffee when she fondly reminisced … or, perhaps made fun of me a little … about the “library reference section” in my purse. Suddenly, after a few years of staying at home with my kids, I was shocked that I had abandoned those pocket-sized books!

But then, I realized I hadn’t – thanks to my smartphone! I have the latest version of the AP Stylebook, a dictionary and a thesaurus at my fingertips. I am completely covered!

I’ve written before about my typewriter, and sometimes I get a bit too nostalgic, but I do enjoy these books sitting on my desk – they seem ready to be called into service at any moment. Pages, both pristine and marked up, sit awaiting the duty that is theirs alone.

Why this little peek into my life – more closely, my desk?

Well, today I received a contract for an article that will run in a national magazine. I am so incredibly proud of the person who inspired this article and I truly hope that this helps him further his deepest desire – to help others. Look for a link when it publishes early next year. These books, the dedication of the key players in the article and my dear (fellow grammar-nerd) sister-in-law (who painstakingly worked to cut nearly 300 words from the original) helped me achieve this goal.

My message today? Don’t give up on these volumes of immense wisdom – love your reference books!

OK. And love ALL of your inspirations, too!

If you enjoy my blog, please consider “liking” my Facebook page – Just Writing Through.

And, I know I need some updated images there, but I haven’t had any snow to photograph!

"Make a gingerbread house"

Today, our Advent calendar read, "Make a gingerbread house."

I spent last night making gingerbread dough, rolling it out and then shaping it into the pieces of a gingerbread house.

The smell of gingerbread permeated the entire kitchen - and probably went up through the children's rooms as well. Thankfully, no one woke up.

Homemade gingerbread dough is a great tradition that my neighbor started and I adopted. I am so blessed to have amazing neighbors who have taught me so much about family, friends, motherhood and life.

So, I baked the pieces and laid them out - don't they look so amazing just sitting there - completely untouched. They are just waiting for little hands to decorate them!

This morning, the kids woke up and, after a Jesse Tree story and ornament-making, they pulled the tag that read, "Make a gingerbread house."

Together we whipped up a batch of royal icing and broke open a few bags of colorful candy.

Then the fun began - my four-year-old piled on the icing and loaded the roof with gumdrops while my eight-year-old carefully piped the icing on the edges and meticulously placed Twizzlers on the roof edges while strategically laying down gum drops in color-order.

This makes me think about both of my children. My four-year-old is completely carefree and whimsical. She is her own person - even at four. She has her own ways of doing things - and she is persistent. She won't settle.

My eight-year-old is more scientific. She likes to stay between the lines, her creativity always is tempered with care and a great deal of thought - making sure that there will be a correct fit before taking the next step.

So it is with life. I am not a risk-taker. I make sure my gingerbread house is secure - and completely dry - BEFORE I add anything more to it. I gently pipe icing on my house with the smallest amount possible. Then, I add a piece. I am steady. I add one gingerbread person and not a lot of decoration - less is more.

That pretty much describes me. I dream big, but I don't always travel very far. I make sure the security net is available, because I want someone to catch me when I fall.  Every so often, I've broken out of my comfort zone. Sometimes, I find it exhilarating and I embrace that whimsical, carefree spirit I see in my youngest daughter. It is in those moments that I remember to embrace that feeling and to encourage my oldest to explore new things - to never feel hindered by the (gingerbread) house she has built, but to every once in a while go to the edge and peer out. Open the door.

That is a lesson I try to hold dear, because you never know what is outside your door!